Can Buy Me Love

Where was I when this was going on? A millionaire looking for mate! Sign me up. And who out there thinks those two met by chance? She's a smart tart. She definitely followed him to the beach with a dog she bought for the purposes of pretending to bump into him. She's my hero.

Please watch the awkwardness occurring about 30 seconds into the film. He's picturing her. She's picturing George Clooney.

T.M.I.

Since I am home for Christmas break and have nothing to do (except for finishing those pesky law school apps), I decided to start going to Mercy Fitness during the day. They have cardio theater, so I figure why not work out and watch TV at the same time. I've heard the gym is a great place to meet guys, but from what I can tell, it's a great place to meet the over-60 crowd. Then, again, that just might be my crowd...

Anyway, the old people are an interesting bunch. An older woman next to me started her treadmill up pretty fast. I was silently praying that she didn't fall off because I am just not good in emergency situations. My "too much information" moment came yesterday while I was using the hip abduction machine (yeah, I didn't know what that was either). Two women, born sometime before FDR left office, were lifting weights. One of them was extremely tiny. The other one was quite muscular. From her U.S. Marines t-shirt, I gathered she had run a few obstacle courses in her day. Probably a few that day. Anyway, I will play back their conversation for you. It was quite disturbing.

Tiny: I've been learning this new oblique exercise in the morning class.

Marine: Oh yeah? I am working out with this bar to get a butt. I am going to get a butt if it kills me.

Tiny: I know what you mean. And it doesn't help that they make the pants all low-rise these days.

Marine: Oh, I like the low-rise. I have a belly ring, and I like to show it off.

I think I just vommed in my mouth a little. This women is somewhere north of 70 years old and she wants to show off her belly button ring? It's not even that she was out-of-shape; it's just that she was... old. I've always expounded the motto: You're only as old as you are at heart. But, lady, surely your heart isn't a 16 year old floozie.

We'll Make It, I Swear

If I lived the days of my life by theme songs, today's would be "Livin' on a Prayer." I am especially referring part where Jon belts out, "Ohhh, we're halfway there..." because today marks the end of the beginning of the MAcc program. Finals week didn't kill me, and I didn't kill anyone. I chalk that up to a success. I haven't received news on all of my grades yet, but I did get one unexpected A. I bought some karma today by donating a book at Barnes and Noble to something for small children. Hopefully that will secure me some more good news.

As I'm sure you've realized, I have been a bad blogger lately. Now that I am on break, I plan to update a lot more!

Lady Luck

Happy November! What? Am I little late on that one? Everyday I look at my Bookmark Bar and see the link for my blog. Unfortunately, I haven't really had time to post anything lately. Well, world, I'm back! That is, I'm back until December. Finals start then, and I will be way too busy for this whole blogging thing. So lame, I know.

I bought my first lottery ticket today. I didn't stop at the gas station to specifically buy a lottery ticket, but I was already there, so I thought it was a good idea to pick one up. And I know that I am not addicted to gambling because I had $3, but I only spent $1 on a lottery ticket. So, I bebop up to the counter and merrily say to the attendant, "I would like to buy a lottery ticket!" She says, "Well, are you 18?" Am I what? I couldn't decide if I should be mad that she thinks I look as old as Miley Cyrus or happy that when I am 60, I'll only look 56. I said to her, "Actually, I'm 22." After giving my license the twice-over, she sold me the winning ticket. They haven't actually announced the numbers yet, but I can feel the magic.

I am so excited that it's almost Thanksgiving. Not only am I super excited for the food, but it also means that I am that much closer to being halfway done with my Masters degree! May could not come soon enough. Seriously, May, come on.

Hot Air and a Plastic Chair

I am blogging to you live from a lawn chair at Hawg Wash. Yes, I am at a laundromat. For the first time since my sophomore year in college, I am using washing machines and dryers that have been used by someone other than me or someone in my family. I must say that this is an interesting place. The attendant keeps glaring at me. I can't possibly be the most shifty person they've had in here. For heaven's sake, I'm using a Mac and reading an Advanced Financial Accounting textbook. I am practically a square around these parts.

So far, I have spent $10 on washing three loads and drying one. That is more expensive than I would expect out of a place with wood panelled walls, but I guess people will pay a high price for clean clothes. On the plus side, this is an excellent place to people watch. The couple next to me has a lot of camouflage items, and the old lady on the other side pulled many pairs of elastic-waisted pants from her dryer.

For the record, I am here because the dryer at the house is out, and I haven't done laundry in two weeks. Good thing my clothing collection has become quite large, or I would not have made it so long.

And We All Fall Down

On many occasions, I have been informed that I have some dangerous dance moves. Dangerously cool? Yeah, I like to think so, but usually these naysayers usually follow up with, "You should stop. You are going to hurt yourself." Psh. I typically buck off these remarks as jealousy at my awesome skills. Today, however, I might have just proved all of those people right.

I blame Jay-Z (Mimi, he is a rap mogul). He recently released a rather catchy diddy called "Empire State of Mind." It has been in my head all day, and it inspires some wicked dancing. Anyway, I was singing it as I was headed downstairs this afternoon. I decided to bust a move on the top stair, but I mainly just busted my butt. You see, the dancing and the socks and the carpet were not a good combination. I went from backin' it up to back on the ground in two seconds. I slipped and saw my feet fly over my head. I landed on my back and slid all the way down the staircase. Ashley came out of the bedroom shouting, "Who should I call? Are you alive?" For the record, I think my answer was "AHHHHH!"

My entire backside will be bruised for a while, but I could not help but laugh. I cannot count the many times that I have fallen down in my life (That time on a busy street in NYC, that time in front of Darian Townes, that time on a glass bottle), but cascading down a flight of stairs has been the least graceful of them all. But, I picked myself up and went on. It's like my friend Lady Gaga says, "Just dance! Gonna be okay!"

The Girls are Back in Town

I know you have all been sitting on pins and needles waiting for another post. Ashley reminded me that it has been quite a while since my last post, so I thought I would end your waiting game. Ashley has been in town all week, so we have just been bebopping around NWA. It has been a blast to have her back! I can't think of why I ever let her marry Ben and move away to Dallas.

In other news, I have been too busy to breathe this semester, thus the lack of updates. And do you know what is annoying when you are really busy? People who think they are really busy. I know people who incessantly drone on about their busy lives, but these people never offer any proof that they actually are busy. If you have time to troll Facebook and Twitter all day, you are not busy. You are annoying. I think these people should get busy doing the 100 billion hours of work that I need to get done. Obviously, I have nothing against mindless activities. I watch my fair share of Cougar Town, but I don't pretend to be busy for the sake of self importance. With that, I think I will put my soapbox away now.